Being a sigma male has its gains and its struggle. There is not one person that is free from struggles in life, but perhaps the sigma male is the only person who suffers what he does because of his unique character archetype. His struggles are not as rare as the struggles of the general populace but their source emanates from his special archetype.
Here are the struggles a sigma male suffers.
1. He is easily misunderstood.
A sigma male is probably the misunderstood person in the whole universe. People misunderstand him in nearly every aspect of his life. One, he is introverted and slow to associate with people. People misconstrue this as him being anti-social and a snob. People feel he believes he is better than everyone else and it’s beneath him to associate with them.
To deal with this struggle, as a sigma male, the average advice is that you need to learn to try and go out more and learn to make small talks that you would rather skip. But this is not who you are as a sigma male, you do not conform to the whims and pressure of society. So you will deal with this struggle the way you know best, ignoring them and being your own person.
One other way people misunderstand the sigma male is in the aspect of leadership. He is not quick to woo the group, in fact, he is a fringe player. But people are aware that he is smart, he is charming and he is capable of effective leadership.
What a sigma male would do when you reject his advances
Because people are used to the machinations of the alpha males and the yes man position of the beta mal and seeing that the sigma male is no yes man, they believe he is another alpha male and that his silence and outlier nature are just shrew calculations in which he is waiting for the right time to strike or pull a coup.
The only way to deal with this struggle is to allow for the passage of time. Time would reveal your true intentions in the group.
People also misunderstand the flirting of the sigma male to mean he’s a player and not one to seek to have a serious relationship with. The truth is that he is slow to trust people with true affection and flirting with girls is just what it is innocent flirting.
But because he is so charming some of these girls may think there is something in there for them with you and may want to pursue it further and may feel heartbroken when you won’t play ball. To deal with this struggle, cut off your flirting. Your intention may be casual but so many people in the fairer gender group may never see it that way.
This needs us to the second major struggle of the sigma male,
2. The sigma male is chased and harassed.
Women want him and the group needs his selfless and capable leadership skill. So they chase and harass him to date them or take charge. But because he cannot date everyone and because he would rather not carry the added pressure of leading, he would decline most of the requests of most people he would come in contact with.
Many people do not take no for an answer and the rest do not know how to handle the word no. So they fight to have you change it to yes or hate your guts for that.
This struggle is perhaps the most intrusive for the sigma male. You would be tempted to crawl into your shell some more and a lot of people did crawl. However, you need to up your communications game – I don’t want this because I am dealing with a lot right now, I have a girlfriend, I won’t stay long in this group, I have another equally challenging commitment, I feel Jonathan would do this better than I would and I mean it, etc.
Be aware that you will not always have the chance to make this speech and prepare to suffer some resentment from refusing to give everyone a piece of you.
3. Invasion of privacy.
The sigma male is a highly individualistic person. He’s solitary and cherishes spending time with himself. A relationship and raising a family would wreck this for him. His wife wants to spend a lot of time with him and the children barge in and out of his space. This can be crazy for him.
Even work has the power to erode his privacy. A busy executive would have a lot of meetings and presentations and calls. When he isn’t doing any of this, he is researching or sleeping. There is little me-time for him.
To deal with this struggle, aspire to do your thing. Build your own business, pour all your genius into it, strive for a couple of years, and become financially free enough to have people doing the running around for you.
For the romantic aspect, marry someone you love so much and who understands you a lot. It is easy to deal with an invasion of privacy from someone you cherish and someone who understands you would allow you a lot of me-times.
For the family aspect, don’t start one until you are 100% emotionally ready to be a father. This is why you need to have an understanding father who would not pressure or emotionally blackmail you into starting a family you are not ready for.
When you have children you are ready for, you would love and cherish them so much you will look forward to spending your me-time with them and would never see them barging at your study as an invasion of privacy.
4. The struggles of lack.
A sigma male is goal-oriented, smart, and his own man. Bur we all know that things do not always work as you plan them and even the smartest person sometimes struggles to become financially free. This is a major blow for the sigma male because he may now have to beg for a favor or two.
The problem is that a sigma male would rather die than ask just anyone for help. And he would die when he risks it all and still get a no.
The surest solution to this is to be successful, although you may want to expand your trusted circle and your connection. See this as part of your business of being financially free.
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